Messy Business

Best to leave bull fighting to the professionals

I’ve just got back from a couple of weeks in the South of France, and very nice it was – thanks for asking.

Had forgotten that it isn’t just the Spanish that are into running with the bulls. A fair was held in a local village and the bulls were allowed a gallop around the main roads.

My best athletic performances have often required some incentivisation, and I quite fancied a quick dash in front of the Taureaux. The kids talked me out of it, suggesting that maybe my best days were behind me (and a diet of pain au chocolat  and vin rouge was not necessarily the right preparation).

All very sensible it turns out. Just been alerted to this bit of research in a Royal College journal, dating back to 2004, on the sorts of injuries that matadors notch up in their bull fights.

The second commonest site of bull gore injury in the matador is the perineal area. Scrotal avulsion often requires plastic surgical reconstruction. Ow.

“Bull horn wounds are usually penetrating and contusive; they have special characteristics, the entry point being small and corresponding with a gap in the aponeurosis. Two or more deep wound tracts may be present hiding important muscular destruction. Wounds are often contaminated with multiple foreign bodies such as cloth fragments, dirt and horn chips,” it says.

Hmmm, think I’ll stick to running with my own personal brand of bullsh*t rather than the real thing…

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